I get it now.
So I'm laying here realizing something I never thought I would. I finally get it now. As I put my 364-day old son down to sleep, I get why my mom always calls me on my birthday and relives the moment I was born all over again. It takes awhile for you to realize how truly life changing that moment is. It's been a year for me, now and I still have trouble wrapping my head around it. I remember thinking after he was born, how can the rest of the world still be going on right now? Doesn't everybody realize that my son, MY SON just looked at me and smiled!?! I really do know, deep down, that my son isn't the first ever born and that life goes on much the same way it did before, but that doesn't change the fact that I remember driving to the hospital and sitting in the waiting room before going in to the materity unit as if it happened last week. In many ways, it still seems like it was last week. It's weird to remember it looking back. It's seemed such a whirlwind since he was born, it's hard to take a breath and remember. It is fun to look back and think how life used to be and how different it's become.
We took pictures in the lobby and we have these big, dumb, goofy smiles because we have no idea what was going on or what was going to happen. I am very thankful that we went to pregnancy class because 95% of what they tell you might happen, did happen to us. We were prepared and knew that it was just part of the process. He had mucomium and his cord was wrapped around his throat, my wife was put on oxygen, she had fluids pumped into her to flush the poop out, the baby's heart rate dropped during contractions, they had to put the connector things on his head to read his vitals. A lot could have gone wrong and they would have whisked her to c-section-ville, but our doctor was solid and patient and knew how to handle the situation. As I think back, I realize that this baby will grow up and be dependent on me in different ways. I pray that I will be what he needs, when he needs it and that he grows up to be a contributing member of society. I thank God for bringing him into my life and I am truly humbled by the miracle that is my son.
I love ya, boy!
laters
cvz
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